I often say, “Life is what happens while you are planning something else”. That doesn’t mean we should stop planning. What is does mean is that we can expect detours and some of them may not be pleasant. Should we pretend that we enjoy the detours when we don’t? Of course not. Putting up a front to others, especially family, friends and loved ones is self inflicted martyrdom. Actually, there is no such thing as self inflicted martyrdom. Martyrdom is always inflicted by others. To try to inflict it on ourselves is psychological suicide and it only multiplies the problem. Besides, no one likes a person who acts like a martyr … a person who pretends to be happy when truly very unhappy.
So, what is one to do when disaster strikes? First, deal with it. Next ask if it is as bad as it could be. Of course it could be worse … there is always something worse. Then thank God it isn’t as bad as it could be. This will mitigate the feeling of missery and bring in an attitude of gratitude. You will feel happier because you now have hope.
This will take some practice but if we keep working on it it will become us. Call it “self inflicted brain washing” if you wish. Brain washing ourselves is a way for us to take control of our own subconscious mind and make ourselves be what we want to be. It is good. It works! At the same time we can develop a habit of looking for things in our lives for which we should be grateful
My storehouse having been burnt down,
nothing obstructs my view of the bright moon.